The 80’s were cool, back in the days kids could play games and had enough skills to do some pranks outside the computer world. Once we hit the end of the 80’s everyone seems to be obsessed with computers. What happend to the cool action hero’s? The cool action cartoon series? The nasty looking toys? The playing in the outside world? Ok, most of the music sucked, but there was the beginning of HipHop, which was better back then than most the shit now. Real Punk still was rockin hardcore, and overall it’s been a fun ride.

A kid’s Hero in the 80’s

Growing up in the 80’s makes you part of a Group introduced to a huge variety of action infested cartoons, Heros with more muscles than brains and Plastic action figures. There were not just nice animation and fast cuts, it was real action. Pharmazeutic Bodybuilder lookalikes were the shit, and if you didn’t have any of the figures you were simply not part of the culture. What happend to those mainstream cartoons once we crossed the 90s…. some suckers wearing pyjarmas instead of fur speedos, no more Mutant Ninjas, no battle Kitties, no Robot Cars & Trucks, no Carnival MASKed transformation vehicles… instead we have fuckin Zoo’s and Trading Cards raping everything that has been done by those Cartoons before. I don’t know exactly what, but hey at least those cartoons were cool.
Give us back some oldschool action heros, the good old non pain in the ass sellout fun.

Every hero gets old

Just as the good old He-Man Action Figures went straight to the attic, only a few strange collectors placed their blistered He-Man on an apron, every super hero gets old. Kids need new heros fucking the establishment. There was a need for more special effects, speed & color, but those attributes don’t make up for weak character design. Where are the Riders with a Saber, or the Rangers cruising a Galaxy, Green Mutants rocking the canalization, and Cats rolling Thunders. I don’t want fuckin yellow little monsters, no fuckin oversized dragon bullshit and no retarded rangers without powers.

What happend to style?

Kids should not be forced to think the new shows are cool, those are simply marketing products. With the simple Goal to SELL THOSE TRADING CARDS. Merchandise is cool, but trading cards are evil. That’s why they don’t rerun the oldschool series and just the trash. Kid’s are good consumers, and why give them quality that has not strings attached when you can sell them trash?

The old Superheros and Action figures are just fading memories bound to the playground of your childhood dreams. It’s time to say goodbye, or rather say hi & hello to the collector editions, they will find ways to get your money as well! Cause we all know, men are always a boy at heart.

The 11. coolest action Hero’s out of the 80’s

11. Jericho Jackson, can’t make a list of Action Heros’ without Action Jackson.

[hitting a bad guy with a flamethrower]
Action Jackson: How do you like your ribs?

10. Marshall Bravestar, the Chuck Norris of the Cartoon world.

09. the Galaxy Rangers, riding on metal horses, who wanted to get boys and girls to watch this show? Nevertheless, Gooseman rocked the shit.

08. Saber Rider & the Starsherifs, Metal horses number 2., seemed to be really popular at that time. A cool Kick ass robots, evil Outriders and nasty space ships, simply perfect.

07. Captain Ivan Danko, or I can beat you up with a burning stone in my hand.

Art Ridzik: What, you retire your uniform?
Ivan Danko: I now work undercover.
Art Ridzik: Undercover? You look like Gumby.

06. Dutch Schaefer, the short guide on how to I kill a Predator with wooden sticks.

Dutch: What’s the matter? The CIA got you pushing too many pencils?

05. Conan the Barbarian, never underestimate a barbarian with an austrian accent.

Mongol General: What is best in life?
Conan: To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women.

04. The Terminator, naked time traveller blowing a good kicking.

The Terminator: Your clothes… give them to me, now.

03. John McClane, average guy in the street name meets irish tough guy ending. McClane can bleed 10 times more than his enemies and still kick their asses.

Supervisor: Attention, whoever you are. This channel is reserved for emergency calls only.
John McClane: No fucking shit, lady. Do I sound like I’m ordering a pizza?

John McClane: Nine million terrorists in the world and I gotta kill one with feet smaller than my sister.

02. John Rambo, Dutch Schaefer’s role model on how to use chopsticks as a weapon. The ultimate guide to surviving in the american wood.

Rambo: I could have killed ‘em all, I could kill you. In town you’re the law, out here it’s me. Don’t push it. Don’t push it or I’ll give you a war you won’t believe. Let it go. Let it go.

01. He-Man aka. Prinz Adam the Wuzz. The prototype of the roided bodybuilder, it does not even matter if he has super powers or is the super wuzz. He’s the prototype Cartoon Superhero Arnie lookalike. He even has a secret identity!

By The Power Of Grayskull, I Have The Power!